Okay, so it’s been another couple of months since my last post and I’m still contemplating how much longer I should keep my blog going. I haven’t quite reached a decision yet so in the meanwhile, I’ll keep this running until I figure out what to do (which is kind of a best of both worlds answer at the moment)!
Anyway, I finally got around to putting some shelves in our hallway over the week. Our little house though small, is blessed with an extremely wide hallway – our hallway is over two metres wide which I love! One of the first things we thought when we bought our home was that the hallway needed some kind of storage so that it was functional but without compromising our space. Over time, we’ve added cabinets but it’s the shelves that really have completed this space.
There’s still much to do in our home – it really is a never ending process but at least that’s another that’s off the list!
As a part of the course, there’s some open forums where students can share their progress or graduates can share their work – kind of like Flickr. And naturally being my nerdy self, I’ve been checking out the forums to see what others are doing out there and get tips for modules that I’m trying to complete.
The challenge with that is that I’m not actually inspired by what I see but don’t get me wrong! There is some amazing photography of landscapes and portraits in there. I appreciate all the hard work that goes into creating these kinds of images as well as the courage to share and receive feedback for them. It’s just not the type of photography that I’m personally in to and that makes it hard to be motivated because I’m such a visual person.
So to make sure that I keep myself motivated, I’ve set up some inspiration cut outs from my favourite photography sources on the wall behind me when I’m studying. I love simplicity and stillness in photos from photographers like Alice Gao as well as magazines like Cereal which has always been what I want to be shooting.
I’ve got a long way to go but hopefully it will keep me motivated – at least I’ll be able to turn around, get a quick dose of inspiration then hit the books again!
I took the plunge this week and completed the first of my new year resolutions – I enrolled in a photography course. Having received lots of advice on what to do and not to do, I finally just sat down and did it.
But the hardest part about all this was actually trying to figure out what I wanted to achieve from it. Was it for better blog photos? Did I want to someday become a freelance photographer? Did I just want to do it because I was feeling creatively challenged? There was an accumulation of all these factors but mounting pressure on myself meant that my self doubt really took over this week.
I don’t take good enough photos, I’m not creative enough and I’ll always just be a try-hard, talentless hack. People will laugh at me and think what I do is rubbish, that I’m wasting time and money doing something that isn’t going to get me anywhere. All these thoughts constantly ring in my head even as I write this and I’m not going to lie – it’s scary, confronting and a little heartbreaking.
I pinned this quote this week because it really resonated with me – I think it sums up how I’m trying to turn the negativity into a positive approach to my studies. I really have no idea what I will achieve from this course but if I never enrolled, then I’ll never know.